Mark Berger is an interesting friend of mine and every now and then writes a passionate rant (in the form of a newsletter) to his friends. His last one reminded me of something I sometimes forget, so I’m sharing it here with his permission.

Over to Mark:

During the past 16 years I have asked thousands of my delegates “What do you really want? What are your goals and dreams?”

Their initial answers include a variety of “things” such as money, possessions, love, recognition, respect, success, health, wealth, happiness, travel, fame & fortune etc.

Then I push a bit harder and ask: “What is the MOST IMPORTANT thing you want, when all is said and done? What would you actually place right at the top of the list?” Without fail, the majority inevitably vote for Happiness. Every time! (They sometimes also refer to it as inner peace, peace of mind, contentment, joy or fulfillment.)

I must therefore conclude that happiness is a fundamental desire for most people, a primary human goal.

In fact, I believe that happiness is built into our being, hardwired to our soul.

We are all born with a natural capacity for happiness, playfulness, creativity, joy and laughter. But as we grow up life happens and many of us lose it, somewhere in the stress, busyness and pressure of our (seemingly) overwhelming responsibilities.

Or our happiness gets smothered by hurt, loss, tragedy, disappointments, hatred, anger or fear. We therefore disconnect from our core state, our birthright and move into the world searching for something which we have always had inside.

Happiness is not something you move towards. It is the place you come from.

• It is the starting point, not the arrival.
• It is the journey, not the destination.
• It is the cause, not the effect.
• Happiness is an Inside Job.

The Self-Help movement would have us believe that The Secret to life is to become clear on what you really want, set SMART goals, harness the power of intention and then as NIKE says “Just do it.” Read the rest of this entry

The Secret Of The Elders…

Last week, I had the great privilege of befriending Jean Oelwang – the CEO of Virgin Unite – Sir Richard Branson’s not-for-profit organization.

Jean has met some pretty influential leaders in her time working for Sir Richard, and she told me a story that inspired me and confirmed something I’ve suspected for a long time.

Jean shared with me that she spent a few days on Nekker Island with The Elders.

The Elders is a group of the greatest peace makers and social revolutionaries of our time. It was founded by Nelson Mandela, is chaired by Archbishop Desmond Tutu and includes people like Kofi Annan and Jimmy Carter.

Recently, Sir Richard charged Jean with the task of observing and studying The Elders (during their time on his Caribbean Island) to find out what they all had in common.

Want to know what Jean discovered?

It’s not what you might think… Read the rest of this entry

In this candid interview, I share openly about the ups and downs of my romantic life and how my partner and I learned to create a relationship that acts as an incubator for self awareness and personal transformation.

You’ll learn:

• How I ended my depression without pills or therapy…
• How letting go of everything might just get you everything you’ve hoped for…
• How to get your romantic partner to open up to you…
• Why waiting for your partner to initiate intimacy is a trap that never works and what to do instead…
• How to create a safe space in your relationship in which your love can thrive…
• How to know when it’s time to break up…
• What to do when you or your partner wants to leave the relationship…
• And tons more useful tips and tricks for being happy and having more love in your life…

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Download as an .mp3

Enjoy…

P.S. Please leave me a comment below. I really want to know what you enjoyed about this interview.

As much as I cringe at the get-rich-quick mentality that makes people write to me asking how to use the Law Of Attraction to win the lottery (really… I get this all the time), I got an email this morning that made me sit up straight and take out my wallet.

In the email (below) my client shared how she used Subliminal Software to win a car, then win $1000, then win $8956.00 from a 20 cent slot machine.

Sound like hype?

Well, about 6 years ago I used the same software to find and buy my dream house (brand new) for $80,000 below market value… then I forgot all about it.

It’s pretty rare that I come out and just blatantly tell you to go buy something. You know… I usually try to be at least a little subtle about it or something, right?

But not this time. This is the real deal.

I just-this-second bought the software (mine was lost when a waitress spilled my drink into my last computer) and I’m itching to begin using it again.

Grab this software for Mac or PC

Talk soon,

P.S. I’ve also used this software to manifest a 6-pack (not the beer kind) and my dream motorcycle…

P.P.S. I don’t believe in the “genie in the sky” type of manifesting promoted in The Secret movie. Bringing anything worthwhile into the world requires the right mindset and a ton of work – just ask any parent.

Here’s how to make manifesting easier and faster using your computer

P.P.P.S. If you buy something as a result of reading this, I’ll get paid money that I will almost certainly squander on guitars or kite-surfing gear (or something equally stupid).

Ever wished you had a magic wand that you could wave and all the angry, upset, depressed people that you waved it at would suddenly start smiling, laughing and even jumping for joy?

Well, I have such a wand… and I made you a quick video showing you how you can get one free and how to use it….

By the end of the video you’ll know 5 essential communication skills for turning an angry person into a purring pussycat…

Once you’re done watching the video, you can download a free pdf printout of these 5 conflict resolution tips.

Let the games begin… Now go share this video with your loved ones and begin practicing!

P.S. As always, your comments are welcomed and always read. Let me know how this video impacted you and if you loved it, I’d be forever grateful if you LIKED it on Facebook and Google +1.

Have you ever wondered why some days you feel PHENOMENAL and other days you feel just… BLAH?

In this short 3 minute video, you’ll discover how you create both… and how to have more phenomenal days…

If you do the exercise the way I describe it in the video above, you’ll discover something truly valuable about yourself and how you go about creating your reality. This is a high leverage exercise, and I recommend doing it right now.

Here are my highest leverage activities that energize and drain me. I’d be curious to hear yours in the comments below.

P.S. I’d be very interested to hear what energizes and drains you? Feel free to leave me a comment below.

Boy, am I glad 2011 is over!

2011 was a helluva year for me – certainly the most challenging one so far.

At the end of each year I look back and write a list of everything I learned that year… and 2011’s list was long.

So that someone other than me benefits from my mistakes, here are the most valuable 3 life lessons I learned in 2011.

LIFE LESSON #1: When I Face My Biggest Fears, Good Things Always Happen…

It was 14 May 2011 and I’m in Las Vegas standing in the wings about to be introduced to the TEDxSinCity audience as their next keynote speaker.

I’m nervous and excited at the same time…

Nervous because this is the most important speech of my life so far and if I fuck it up, I’ll look really bad in front of some of my most respected peers – and the world (watching the event live over the internet).

One year earlier, when asked if I’d like to take responsibility for organizing and speaking at the event, I almost backed out of the opportunity of a lifetime – to have the honor to speak at a prestigious TEDx event and have my work impact thousands of people on the internet.

“I just don’t have the time to put into organizing that kind of event and writing a speech…” was the pathetic excuse I came up with. Read the rest of this entry

If you ask me what I do for a living, I’m unlikely to reply “Relationship Breakup Coach“. However, it appears that the powers that be seem to think I’m up to the job of helping people heal from heartbreak.

How did I get this title?

Well, it all started with me sharing the intimate, most vulnerable feelings about my last breakup on this very blog. As I often do when I am facing a problem I have no idea how to solve (in this case, getting my ex back), I researched breakups, relationships and romantic partnerships from the best of the best.

Soon, word spread that I knew a thing or two about the human dynamics that occur between two people when they breakup, and I was approached to “open” the Breakup Solution Summit as their keynote speaker.

In the interview below, you’ll learn practical advice, healing insights and powerful tools to not just get over and heal from a break up, but also how to communicate with your ex, and when to let go.

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Download it here

Links mentioned in the call:

• Free Guided Visualization Training
• 5 Healing Conversations To Have After A Relationship Breakup
• Relationship Breakup Coaching
• Listen to more interviews like this at the Breakup Solution Summit

This is good stuff… Enjoy.

P.S. As usual, I’d appreciate it if you left a comment below…

 

Ever noticed how your current relationships may turning out very similar to your past relationships – business or romantic?

If you’ve ever broken up with someone, or been the one on the receiving end of a breakup conversation, you know how painful breakups can be. Also, you probably know how easy it is to carry the hurt and pain of a past relationship into all your future ones…

When we don’t complete our relationships powerfully and with love (i.e. completion means wrapping them up once they end such that you feel empowered), we carry the pain, hurt and unnecessary meaning (emotional baggage) from that relationship into future relationships.

To help avoid this destructive pattern, I’ve created 5 short conversations to have with your ex (business partner or lover), so that you both leave the relationship with your power and sense of self in tact.

Interestingly, when my last relationship ended, I went through this process with my ex… We were both in tears of appreciation for each other afterward.

One month later, she called me saying that she wanted to spend the rest of her life as my life partner. We’re back together now and deeper in love than ever before. I don’t think that could have happened without these 5 conversations. Read the rest of this entry

If I told you that you never had to suffer again, would you believe me? In this video, you'll learn:

• How to end suffering for good
• The difference between pain and suffering and why it's important to feel pain

Register for the Breakup Solution Summit for free and hear me teach a bunch more distinctions about:

• How to stop replaying the past over and over in your mind and move on with your life today peacefully and powerfully
• How to turn a messy breakup into an opportunity you can benefit from
• How to use your breakup to become more self-aware, so that your next relationship is not a repeat of your last one

P.S. Your opinion matters to me. Please leave me a comment below. I read each one...

Read this next: 5 Healing Conversations To Have After A Relationship Breakup