Two Big, Embarrassing CONFESSIONS

Before I get to not one but *TWO* big, embarrassing confessions (hell, I’d rather not get to them at all…) let me ask you a question to make myself feel better:

Tell me something…

Have you ever met someone who you felt might be “the one” and then totally “blown it” with them?

Maybe you thought you really had a “chance” of being together forever?

But somewhere along the line, something went WRONG… the chemistry between you was electrifying at first, but over time your connection faded and you began to argue with each other.

Then, either:

  1. one of you ended the relationship… OR
  2. you’re still with him/her, but you feel stuck – feeling trapped or alone in a relationship filled with tension and fuzzy communication.

Either way, here comes my embarrassing CONFESSION #1: Read the rest of this entry

How To Be A Truly Great Leader

Have you ever dreamed of doing something truly great? Here’s what the world’s truly greatest leaders all have in common…

Earlier this year, I met Jean Oelang – the CEO of Virgin Unite, Richard Branson’s not-for-profit organization.

Jean was involved in helping select a group of the worlds greatest leaders (including Nelson Mandela) to be a part of The Elders (read more about them in the box below).

The Elders

The Elders

As I read more about the inception of The Elders, I learned that a strict criteria was used to ensure that only people of the highest caliber were selected for the group.

I personally love this set of criteria and they spoke to me in a way that called me to become the kind of person who could have been selected too.

I’m sharing them here with you in the hope that they will call you to becoming a greater version of yourself and do something truly great in your life. Read the rest of this entry

[REPLAY] Practical Love Advice

Here’s an hour of me answering some of the most common questions about relationships and how to make them work:

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In this audio you’ll learn:

  • Why you lose yourself in relationships and how to get yourself back!
  • Why your partner gives you the silent treatment and how to get them out of their shell when they do
  • How to know when it’s time to break up or stick at it
  • How to encourage your partner to express their feelings
  • When your relationship will most likely get stuck and what to do about it if it is
  • How to keep your relationship a safe haven that your partner will keep wanting to return to
Want deep intimacy and to secure your love to last a lifetime? Join me in the Love At First Fight Coaching Program starting online Saturday, 18 August 2012.

“Bruce. Thanks for your teleclass! Hailstorms and turtles.
The cage and the bird! Awesome!”
– NL, New York

“At last! Some practical relationship advice that I can go home and apply right now” – CB, New Jersey

Ninja Communication Skills

Did you watch the 2012 Olympic opening ceremony on Friday night?

I was chatting to a friend about it this morning and we both noted how fun it was to experience the richness of British culture watching the Queen, Mr. Bean and James Bond during the opening ceremony…

Ever noticed how when you visit some countries, you feel pulled into a magical reality, rich with meaning…

…while other countries have cultures that feel flat, repressed or shallow?

You may not have thought about it, but your relationship also has a culture

The two of you give off a “vibe” that others can pick up on. And because you spend so much time with your chosen mate, the culture of your relationship will largely determine how your life turns out, so this is an important distinction.

The question it raises is:

Is the culture in your relationship one that feels welcoming, exciting, and warm with the intimacy that comes from being fully known and deeply seen by your lover…

OR

…is the culture of your relationship one that feels heavy, cold and unsafe, where you both tiptoe around on eggshells to avoid provoking each other?

Which more accurately describes your relationship?

You most likely relate to both, depending on where you are in your lives together.

At one point, the culture in my relationship was like the culture of a war torn country – cold, hard and deserted. It seemed like every communication turned into a fight – every bid for love was seen as an attack.

I had to do something, because despite all my communication skills learned as an internationally acclaimed speaker and trainer, I still could not accomplish the simple task of getting the woman that I loved to respond to me.

The highest leverage point for creating
a “culture of intimacy” in your relationship…

The culture in your relationship is determined by your ability to communicate with your partner in a way that resolves conflict and creates intimacy.

Of course, this skill was never taught to us as we were growing up, so most of us feel emotionally shipwrecked when conflict arises during the Power Struggle stage of our relationship.

I know I did.

I discovered that the communication skills required to get me into a relationship were very different from those required to get me through the Power Struggle stage of a relationship.

So I began devouring every book and course I could find on communication and conflict resolution… And in the process, we learned a new set of communication skills that saved our relationship.

A pleasant side-effect of using these skills has been that we’ve created a culture of acceptance, unconditional love and mutual respect in our relationship, without actually setting out specifically to do so.

Learn a powerful “culture creation” tool

Conflict Resolution skills
I’m making videos as part of the launch of my new Love At First Fight relationship training program, so you can get a feel for what it’s like to learn with me.

I just finished up a new one teaching you a core skill for turning a fight into an opportunity for intimacy.

Click on the link below to watch it.

Ninja communication skills

Talk soon,

P.S. My new relationship training program is opening soon. Keep an eye on your inbox if you already know that you’re interested in joining us.

P.P.S. Even if you’re not fighting with your partner now, someday you’ll wish you had the ability to de-escalate a fight. Trust me on this one.

 

An Open-hearted Letter About A New Direction

If you read my newsletters then you’re pretty special – and no, I’m not blowing smoke up  your ass! :-)

You are in a very small group of people on the planet interested in becoming a better human being… and that is rare.

So first off, I want to say THANK YOU… for being the kind of person who doesn’t just follow the herd… for being a free thinker… for reading my blog..

Without you, my work makes no difference.

Today I want to share something more personal than usual.

You perhaps know me as the guy who teaches people to be more successful, master their mindset and attract their dream life using the Law Of Attraction.

That business has been generous to me, allowing me to travel, a passive income and the ability to live and work from a beach on an island in the Caribbean.

…and for that, I am extremely grateful.

But the time has come for me to keep growing. Read the rest of this entry

The Relationship Manifesto

Jean and Sir Richard

Jean and Sir Richard

The Secret Of The Elders…

Last week, I had the great privilege of befriending Jean Oelwang – the CEO of Virgin Unite – Sir Richard Branson’s not-for-profit organization.

Jean has met some pretty influential leaders in her time working for Sir Richard, and she told me a story that inspired me and confirmed something I’ve suspected for a long time.

Jean shared with me that she spent a few days on Nekker Island with The Elders.

The Elders is a group of the greatest peace makers and social revolutionaries of our time. It was founded by Nelson Mandela, is chaired by Archbishop Desmond Tutu and includes people like Kofi Annan and Jimmy Carter.

Recently, Sir Richard charged Jean with the task of observing and studying The Elders (during their time on his Caribbean Island) to find out what they all had in common.

Want to know what Jean discovered?

It’s not what you might think… Read the rest of this entry

5 Essential Communication Skills For Conflict Resolution

Ever wished you had a magic wand that you could wave and all the angry, upset, depressed people that you waved it at would suddenly start smiling, laughing and even jumping for joy?

Well, I have such a wand… and I made you a quick video showing you how you can get one free and how to use it….

By the end of the video you’ll know 5 essential communication skills for turning an angry person into a purring pussycat…

Once you’re done watching the video, you can download a free pdf printout of these 5 conflict resolution tips.

Let the games begin… Now go share this video with your loved ones and begin practicing!

P.S. As always, your comments are welcomed and always read. Let me know how this video impacted you and if you loved it, I’d be forever grateful if you LIKED it on Facebook and Google +1.

My Top 3 Life Lessons Learned In 2011

2011
Boy, am I glad 2011 is over!

2011 was a helluva year for me – certainly the most challenging one so far.

At the end of each year I look back and write a list of everything I learned that year… and 2011’s list was long.

So that someone other than me benefits from my mistakes, here are the most valuable 3 life lessons I learned in 2011.

LIFE LESSON #1: When I Face My Biggest Fears, Good Things Always Happen…

It was 14 May 2011 and I’m in Las Vegas standing in the wings about to be introduced to the TEDxSinCity audience as their next keynote speaker.

I’m nervous and excited at the same time…

Nervous because this is the most important speech of my life so far and if I fuck it up, I’ll look really bad in front of some of my most respected peers – and the world (watching the event live over the internet).

One year earlier, when asked if I’d like to take responsibility for organizing and speaking at the event, I almost backed out of the opportunity of a lifetime – to have the honor to speak at a prestigious TEDx event and have my work impact thousands of people on the internet.

“I just don’t have the time to put into organizing that kind of event and writing a speech…” was the pathetic excuse I came up with. Read the rest of this entry

The Relationship Breakup Coaching Interview

 If you ask me what I do for a living, I’m unlikely to reply “Relationship Breakup Coach“. However, it appears that the powers that be seem to think I’m up to the job of helping people heal from heartbreak.

How did I get this title?

Well, it all started with me sharing the intimate, most vulnerable feelings about my last breakup on this very blog. As I often do when I am facing a problem I have no idea how to solve (in this case, getting my ex back), I researched breakups, relationships and romantic partnerships from the best of the best.

Soon, word spread that I knew a thing or two about the human dynamics that occur between two people when they breakup, and I was approached to “open” the Breakup Solution Summit as their keynote speaker.

In the interview below, you’ll learn practical advice, healing insights and powerful tools to not just get over and heal from a break up, but also how to communicate with your ex, and when to let go.

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Download it here

Links mentioned in the call:

This is good stuff… Enjoy.

P.S. As usual, I’d appreciate it if you left a comment below…

 

How To End Suffering…

If I told you that you never had to suffer again, would you believe me? In this video, you'll learn:
  • How to end suffering for good
  • The difference between pain and suffering and why it's important to feel pain
Register for the Breakup Solution Summit for free and hear me teach a bunch more distinctions about:
  • How to stop replaying the past over and over in your mind and move on with your life today peacefully and powerfully
  • How to turn a messy breakup into an opportunity you can benefit from
  • How to use your breakup to become more self-aware, so that your next relationship is not a repeat of your last one

P.S. Your opinion matters to me. Please leave me a comment below. I read each one...

Read this next: 5 Healing Conversations To Have After A Relationship Breakup

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